The rest of high school wasn’t too eventful so lets just flash forward to college. It was in college I was first really diagnosed with a mental illness. I went to a college depression screening which led me to counseling courtesy of the university. I really only remember going to two or three sessions, I got absolutely nothing out of that experience. I kept for the most part to myself, made absolutely no friends there. It was always hard for me to make friends. It was during this time that I started to get sick, not going to classes, skipping assignments. Ultimately, I was placed on academic suspension and never returned. I was a theatre production major and had moved on to a new profession anyway, EMS.
A former friend of mine convinced me to join the local ambulance squad in the next town over. He said I’d meet women. I never met the one there but it led me to what little of a career I have today. Dates aren’t too clear with me but it was along this time that I’ve gotten sick again, this time leading to my first hospital admission. It was also this time that I made a huge jump and moved away from most of my friends and family at the time, needless to say it didn’t last long and I’ve moved back to the area I had left originally. Over this course of time I lost track of a good six months of my life as I was hospitalized more than I can remember.
Some people may think this is really pathetic, but dates really don’t stay in my memory. I don’t even remember when I met my wife. I only remember our wedding day sometimes because I have the date in my phone calendar.
So this brings me to today. I’m on meds (when I remember to take them) and therapy. I left a lot out I think, my alcoholic mother, my missing father but I don’t remember too many details to tell any stories.